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The perfect scroll by princendymion The perfect scroll by princendymion
Pfffft... what's with all that "she's gotta be sweet, he's gotta be kind" crap. I need none of that! THIS is the real list.

A couple of weeks ago I saw this stupid stupid stupid Sandra Bullock movie, the one where she and Nicole Kidman are witches. Well, her character, as a child, casts a spell describing the perfect man, and she makes him impossible so she'd never fall in love. So... vaguely inspired by that, I decided to do my own list :giggle: And I decided to do both boy AND girl, so as to cover any chance =P

I'm sorry if it's huge, it wouldnt have worked the same way had I posted it in two pieces. Just scroll, you lazy bastard. Oh, and full view is not recommended, it's MANDATORY :evillaugh:

Comments are more than welcome, I just don't expect much critique on the artwork since it's only for fun. Oh, and before you comment, please remember, it's HUMOR.
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:iconasbebers:
Asbebers Featured By Owner Apr 28, 2014
Hahahaha, amazing drawings. I share your points about the perfect girl, I must say. 
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:iconpurplepam2012:
purplepam2012 Featured By Owner May 4, 2013
Hahaha!!! I love your illustrations!! Hahaha!! Great job!! :lmao:
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:iconmoonpaw11:
MoonPaw11 Featured By Owner Jan 30, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
Omg I do all those things on the girl list except the cello :giggle:
Reply
:iconsteamhead1880:
SteamHead1880 Featured By Owner Jan 9, 2013  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
For me, you nailed the perfect girl. You maid her sound like a real dork! And to be honest, I think is the best kind of gall their is!
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:icon989466:
989466 Featured By Owner Nov 13, 2012  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
O_O wow the girl one theirs only 3 things that don't apply to me. 1. not not good at video games(although i try X3), 2. i dont have freckles on my back, just tiny scares that look like them. 3.i dont under stand math at all. and maybe half on the cello thing (im getting one in Christmas :D) other than that i do the rest of the things XD
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:iconvarsa-svasa:
Varsa-svasa Featured By Owner Oct 26, 2012
Out of the girls, I have seven KD :iconrazycryplz: Dear god please help me.
Out of the guys, I have none, and know no one with them. :iconsuperw00tplz:
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:iconodwild:
odwild Featured By Owner Oct 11, 2012
Bloody brilliant :iconveryexcitedplz:
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:iconpedrohenrique-2:
PedroHenrique-2 Featured By Owner Aug 24, 2012  Hobbyist Digital Artist
Ahhh i loved! Hillarious!
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:iconwhitelupine:
Whitelupine Featured By Owner Aug 18, 2012  Hobbyist Digital Artist
I love this! Perfectly (whatididthere) sums up my perfect man XD
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:iconwolf--eyes:
wolf--eyes Featured By Owner Jul 22, 2012
I love this! I think if you combined my friends and I you'd -almost*- have the perfect girl =P :+fav:
*none of us know how to play the cello
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:iconkapuchino157:
Kapuchino157 Featured By Owner Jul 20, 2012   Traditional Artist
Oooh, I think I remember that movie
she didn't wanna fall in love in fear of losing her man once she saw this rare bug, right?
I don't remember the title...
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:iconcytoskelly:
CytoSkelly Featured By Owner Mar 19, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
you like your girls to have lost some toes to frostbite?
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:iconitland-9-13:
itland-9-13 Featured By Owner Mar 11, 2012  Hobbyist Digital Artist
This was fun!
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:iconhokova:
Hokova Featured By Owner Mar 6, 2012  Student Traditional Artist
I dont think the movie is stupid but this was hilarious to read, tooXD
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:iconhokova:
Hokova Featured By Owner Mar 6, 2012  Student Traditional Artist
The girl part almost all fits my classmate:D
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:iconalberthein1:
Alberthein1 Featured By Owner Feb 11, 2012
I'd drink to that.
It's not "the perfect" of those, no. But for humor, I say AYE.
Also, perfect would be a opinion, so if you think that's perfect, that's perfect - for you, ofcourse :)
Good humor you got there, I hope you do more of these.
(though this is probably one of your old works, Am I right?)
Reply
:iconlittlebri317:
littlebri317 Featured By Owner Jan 23, 2012
I like the list reminds me a lot of me and my boyfriend LOL
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:iconcarrottrees:
carrottrees Featured By Owner Jan 19, 2012  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
:') Oh wow , this is brilliant and I love the witches of eastwick :3
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:iconizburg:
Izburg Featured By Owner Jan 17, 2012
i like his but idk if i agree with it
Reply
:iconiceytoushirou:
iceytoushirou Featured By Owner Jan 13, 2012  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
oddly enough, most of those girl ones apply to me.......... well I am rather strange.
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:iconiratheiv:
IRAtheIV Featured By Owner Dec 27, 2011   Traditional Artist
yup, thats me :D
Reply
:icontwillyane:
Twillyane Featured By Owner Dec 15, 2011  Hobbyist
I fit in most of the girl things, yay! Only...... No, there are a couple of them... Oh dear, I shall never become your wife :c It fills me with sadness!



Really love these kinds of projects :D
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:iconpentharis:
pentharis Featured By Owner Dec 14, 2011
:D This makes me smile so much. Bwee~
Reply
:iconthesolitaryflower:
TheSolitaryFlower Featured By Owner Dec 4, 2011  Student Writer
i'm practically all of those perfect girl things, too. all accept for the cello playing part. it's trombone for me :)
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:iconthesolitaryflower:
TheSolitaryFlower Featured By Owner Dec 4, 2011  Student Writer
lol that's all so true
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:iconori-j:
Ori-J Featured By Owner Nov 23, 2011
This is brilliant. I would suggest making this into a meme, but that would ruin it XDDD
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:iconangelsshadow96:
AngelsShadow96 Featured By Owner Dec 6, 2011
suddenly, it'd become mainstream and lame ;D
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:iconori-j:
Ori-J Featured By Owner Dec 7, 2011
Precisely!
Reply
:iconangelsshadow96:
AngelsShadow96 Featured By Owner Dec 8, 2011
so we have to keep it on the hushity-hush
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:iconori-j:
Ori-J Featured By Owner Dec 9, 2011
no-one but the millions of watchers shall now about this here piece of genius XDDD
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:iconangelsshadow96:
AngelsShadow96 Featured By Owner Dec 9, 2011
the other millions of people will be missing out
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:iconkranner98:
kranner98 Featured By Owner Nov 4, 2011  Student Writer
lol, don't pretend you don't know the name of the movie! We all know you secretly enjoyed it :D
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:iconplsc:
plsc Featured By Owner Oct 7, 2011  Student General Artist
love it,i think the gild may be me (even down to pretending to speak french) except i can't play cello, I'll learn and get back to you. x
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:iconzerotw:
Zerotw Featured By Owner Oct 6, 2011
OMG Then I have found the perfect one
she its the perfect!!!!!!!!!!!!
Reply
:iconbayushi-tai:
Bayushi-Tai Featured By Owner Sep 22, 2011  Hobbyist General Artist
I'd recomended this for a DD but i didn't have a word back yet...
Who thinks the same as me ? This deviation worths a DD !!
Reply
:iconerehime:
Erehime Featured By Owner Sep 21, 2011
Really, really fun -^^-
Reply
:iconappleandtangerine:
appleandtangerine Featured By Owner Sep 12, 2011  Hobbyist Digital Artist
haha I had a great laugh out of this! :D
Reply
:icona-northern-lad:
a-northern-lad Featured By Owner Sep 10, 2011  Hobbyist General Artist
I love this. I find back freckles incredibly attractive also.
Reply
:iconevolet9x9:
Evolet9x9 Featured By Owner Sep 3, 2011
Sadly, the only perfect thing about me here is the round bellybutton.
Reply
:icontickkid:
Tickkid Featured By Owner Sep 2, 2011
This is really fun.
Reply
:iconnykiilynn:
NykiiLynn Featured By Owner Sep 2, 2011  Hobbyist Writer
uhm.. thats a little dumb..
Reply
:iconeevylynn:
EevyLynn Featured By Owner Sep 2, 2011  Student General Artist
I adore this! XD
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:iconbayushi-tai:
Bayushi-Tai Featured By Owner Aug 27, 2011  Hobbyist General Artist
I'd suggested this for a DD a few weeks ago but nothing yet...
Reply
:iconmusicxofaxdeadxopera:
musicXofaXdeadXopera Featured By Owner Aug 17, 2011  Hobbyist Writer
I can fit a lot of the perfect girl qualities... if only I was so *sigh*
Reply
:iconajjenks:
AJJenks Featured By Owner Jul 21, 2011
LOVE your style!!
Reply
:iconkittykittymi004:
KittyKittymi004 Featured By Owner Jul 20, 2011  Hobbyist General Artist
I know people almost exactly like this!!!! :iconiknowplz:
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:iconlyasa:
LyaSa Featured By Owner Jul 1, 2011  Hobbyist General Artist
lol
Reply
:iconiamknight:
iAmKnight Featured By Owner Jun 29, 2011  Student General Artist
This is so lovely, witty even. I'll admit to comparing myself against the qualities, as I'm sure we've all done while reading it. I started reading the image before even seeing your statement about it. I think it makes it even funnier to fully believe someone wanted these specific traits in someone, even though you said you were just doing this for fun. Surely shows that you must have enjoyed it. Art just for fun is always the best. :) Wonderful job on such a whimsical piece. Definitely faving it. :+favlove:
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:iconplurienz3392:
plurienz3392 Featured By Owner Jun 25, 2011
I've seen that movie, too. Practical Magic and you're right, Your list is better! From now on. I'll be using these standards! hehehe
Reply
:iconplurienz3392:
plurienz3392 Featured By Owner Jun 25, 2011
And BTW I just checked myself against this list and I pretty much fail. :p
But to be fair I checked the all the guys I ever had a crush on against the other list and they fail too! Makes me wonder what I ever saw in them, the losers. :D
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